Monday, July 30, 2012

A Gnat Just Flew Up My Nose

Seriously. That's not, like, some witty title for a post. A gnat just actually flew up my nose. And frankly, I'm not thrilled about it. Because, as of right now, I have still not pinpointed its location. So, to my (neurotic) mind, there are only three possibilities:

1. It's lodged in mucus somewhere, and will be blown out in the natural course of things. Although this is the best option, since I have been searching for it, vigorously, I don't have high hopes. (It's not picking your nose if you have a tissue wrapped around your finger, right?!?)

2. It's already buried deep within my sinus cavity where the dark, moist environment is perfect for egg laying. In three weeks I will be naturally labotomized by millions of baby gnat larvae living off my brain tissue and my children will find me rocking in the corner, drooling.

3. It's hanging around in that mysterious space between nose and throat, waiting like a ninja to drop down into my trachea, then into my lungs where it will burrow and (insert the second half of #2 here, but something with lungs).

AND I AM SUPPOSED TO WRITE LIKE THIS!? I AM A TICKING TIME BOMB, FFS!!!



And this, my friends, demonstrates the lengths I will go to NOT to work on my current WIP. Welcome to my world.

10 comments:

  1. LMFAO!!!!

    I like the way you put your creative brain power to use. ;-)

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  2. I almost strafed my laptop with coffee.
    Thank you!

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  3. Oh Christine ! I wish it gets out soon, so that you can take a break to celebrate the victory over it !

    And on another note.. "Welcome to my world" was one of the dialogues that my hero uttered right before he lunged for the villan..but well, in your case.. I get what you mean :)

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  4. I'm laughing and wide awake now...and I haven't sipped my coffee yet! LOL, let me clarify. I'm not laughing AT you...just at your rendition of it all :).

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  5. how can you not click on a title that begins like that! I hope you got over your gnat problem.

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  7. Update:

    Alas, it is as I feared. The gnat never did make another appearance, so it's safe to say that as I write this, my brains are slowly being consumed by the nefarious nit. I can feel myself getting weaker,words are swimming before mine eyes. Why me? WHYYYYYYY!???!?

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  8. Ditto what Ella said!!!! And- GROSS! Not just the subject matter...matter? ugh! But also, the imagery of you picking through every used tissue you purge into, looking for said gnat! I see why you assume I was abducted by aliens and implanted...you've got a major screw loose chickie!

    On the bright side, maybe said gnat wasn't actually a gnat. Did ya consider that? Huh? Maybe it was your muse in disguise to see what you do when she's not there pecking on your brain to work the parts loose so you'll write.

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  9. Hello, are there? Are you still alive? Is she still alive? My partner just had the gnt-up-nose experience. How long do we have?

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